Workout Theory revisited

A few months ago, I wrote a little about my current workout theory (http://themeofabsence.com/2009/11/workout-theory.html) The basic routine was to do a full-body lifting session three times per week and cardio twice each week.

After trying that routine for two months, more or less (and a lot less during the holidays), I decided to switch things around on January 1, and moved to an upper/lower split.

Here is my current routine:
Day 1: Upper body
Day 2: Lower body / Core
Day 3: Cardio
Day 4: Rest
Repeat

On a typical upper body day, I do two exercises for each group: chest, back, and shoulders/traps. I finish up with a lift for biceps and another for triceps. With this, I’m working all of the major upper body groups enough to get caught posing in the mirror afterwards. I just do 3x10 reps for each exercise, but it differs for everyone. Some people need to do 15 reps, others will do 6 or even less.

Leg day is a little different this time around. I decided to give in to my inner Ronnie Coleman. Be a man, pick up the barbell, and squat. Other than the part about being a man, this has been going pretty well. Squatting has always been my weakest exercise, and while you won’t see a 103 pound girl in the gym lifting less than me, you will see me squatting there now. I’ll have more about proper form later, but for now the only thing to remember about squatting is that you must just do it. You’ll gain strength over time, so the immediate goal is just to do the exercise properly. Eventually, you’ll have no problem putting that 103 pound girl to shame.

With that said, here is my current leg day routine: Squats (3x10), Dumbbell lunges (3x10), Dead lifts or RLDs (3x10), Hip Abductors (2x12), Hip Abductors (2x12), Hip Adductors (2x12), Standing Calves (2x12), Seated or Donkey Calves (2x12), Lower Back Extensions (3x10), Reverse Crunches (3xfail), Crunches (3xfail)

That leg day may look like a lot, but the majority of the work is in the squats, lunges, and dead lifts. The rest of the exercises are isolated lifts that don’t take very long. The workout takes around 45 minutes plus warm-up and cool-down.

For cardio day, I just pick a machine and do thirty minutes plus a five minute cool down period. Put on headphones and listen to something that isn’t very boring. I’d recommend getting a copy of Atlas Shrugged on CD, but that’s just me.

Full body vs. Upper / Lower
I find three big flaws with a full-body routine. The first is that it takes almost sixty minute to do, and that doesn’t include warm-up, cool-down, and stretching. The other flaw is that you generally only do one lift per muscle group. Another problem is that if you train all of your upper body muscles first, you’re worn out once you start working your legs. You can alternate between upper and lower, but to me, it seemed like as soon as I got the blood flowing in my chest, I was doing leg press.

With the upper/lower split, I feel like there is more of a chance to really work each muscle group. You still train each group twice per week and have enough days off to recover. This split also takes less time than a full body routine, so if you feel the need, you’re free to add in some “looks only” exercises, like an extra set of curls.

I schedule a fixed day for cardio because the only cardio I do on lifting days is for warm-up and cool-down. I find it mandatory to schedule the cardio day as part of the routine; otherwise it doesn’t get done. Don’t take the advice of the muscle magazines where they just say “Do Cardio three times a week.” An arbitrary “three times a week” quickly becomes zero times a week.

Scheduling in a fixed rest day is also very import because it prevents what I call the “I’ll work out tomorrow” syndrome.

Tips that magazines often leave out

1. Do you ever see the guy on the standing calves machine bouncing up and down, apparently trying to do three hundred reps in two minutes? Don’t do that. I don’t even know what he’s trying to do, but when you work your calves, work them like any other muscle. Focus on the lift, exhale and push. Hold for a second at the top, then inhale while you go back down to starting position.

2. They take it for granted that everyone knows how to squat. Normal guys and gal don’t. I think after ten years of weight-training, I’m finally starting to get it. First, use less weight. Who care what it looks like? Nobody is watching you. (Unless your form is bad, then people with blogs are watching. And laughing.) Start with the barbell on your traps and your hands in a comfortable place. Position your feet just outside of shoulder-width. Arch your back. Maintain the arch and inhale as you lower. When your thighs are parallel to the ground, push down with your heels. Envision your power coming from hips and being force down through your heels. Exhale while you stand up. Keep your abs tight, your ass tight, and your back at the natural arch. Don’t round your back. Don’t go too fast. Don’t use too much weight. Don’t lock your knees at the standing position.

3. Don’t forget to stretch before you hit the shower. And don’t half-ass your stretching, either. Give yourself five minutes. When you touch your toes, exhale as you reach. Hold the position, but don’t force it. And for the love of God, don’t bounce your stretching. You’ll look as silly as the bouncing calves man.

In closing, I want to mention a guy I used to see at my old gym. I still cringe when I think about him doing leg presses. He would load up the machine with way too much weight and then… I am not making this up… he would perform the leg press while pushing on his quads, right above his knees until his legs were fully extended and then lock his knees at the top. Full body leg press, I guess? Whatever it was, I’m sure there’s a rich knee surgeon somewhere out there now.

Happy Birthday to Theme of Absence

This site turned twelve today. Look for more content throughout the year.

Happy 2010!!

V: The Remake

I was a big fan of V and V: The Final Battle in the 80’s, but when I heard there was a new remake coming I said the same thing everyone else said, “Well, it can’t be as bad as Rob Zombie’s Halloween.”

After watching the pilot episode, here are my initial thoughts, with minimal spoilers.

There’s a couple of good things going on. First off, they have Joel Gretsch from “The 4400” and Steven Spielberg’s “Taken” playing a priest. He rules. The special effects are good, as expected. One thing that is different from the original series is that they’re playing up the angle that the aliens have been here for a long time, disguised as humans and causing havoc all over the planet. Sounds a lot like the plot to Whitley Strieber’s 2012: The War for Souls. Although I doubt Ann Coulter’s reptilian alter-ego will make an appearance in V.

There are a lot of veiled Obama references in the pilot episode as well. The aliens are portrayed as saviors bringing about hope, unity and “Universal Healthcare,” while the priests try to warn the world not to have too much devotion to a force they know so little about. The aliens also blacklist any media they deem “unfriendly.” Sound familiar?

There were a few things I didn’t like. They way the humans constantly referred to the visitors as “V's” almost made me hit delete on the DVR. There was also a big sub-plot where a divorced FBI agent is arguing with her son about the V’s and how his dad ran out their family. Totally forced and pointless.

The writers rushed the plot in parts. I didn’t see a need to reveal as much as they did in the pilot episode. Sure everyone watching already knows the bad guys are lizard people, but it would have been nice to see it build a little. Someone on facebook made the comment that the episode seemed like it was booked by Vince Russo. I wouldn’t say it was that extreme, but it was still a good analogy as far as pacing was concerned.

If you missed the pilot episode, you can watch it only starting November 7 from ABC’s website (http://abc.go.com/watch). If you’re looking for some nostalgia for the old series, you won’t find it, but if you’re into aliens, reptoids, or just good sci-fi, I’d say it’s definitely worth taking the time to watch.

Oh and Diana from the original series is WAY hotter than the lead villain on the new series.

Workout theory

You’re probably wondering who I am and why you should care about my workout theory. To answer the first point, I’m nobody. But that’s why you should care. I’m just a 33-year-old guy with average height, average weight, average build, with average health. I’ve been working out for about ten years and thought it would be worth sharing my workout experience because there’s not enough “average guy” workout advice out there. Everything you read in the magazines or on the web from “professionals” are just that. They are written by professionals for professionals. What I hope to give you is the Dave Ramsey version of weight lifting; stuff that you’re common sense probably already tells you.

Training Splits

Here’s something I wish I would have realized a long time ago. Training splits do not work. I wasted several years saying things like “Today is chest day.” If you open up any weight lifting magazine and look at a random body-builder’s weekly training split, he/she will be doing some sort of variation of this:

Day 1: Chest, Triceps
Day 2: Rest
Day 3: Back, Biceps
Day 4: Legs
Day 5: Rest
Day 6: Shoulders, Abs
Day 7: Rest

Some of the even more silly ones split their quads and hams into separate days. Let me reiterate, splits like this work fine for the professional body builder. For guys and gals like us, the only thing a split like the one above gives us is the tendency to over train our chest day, than take it easy on back day because our chest is still sore. With a split like that, you’re also working your upper body three days a week and your lower body only once.

Another huge drawback of a split week is that if you miss a day, your entire workout routine is screwed. I can’t tell you how many times I tried one of the random muscle mag splits for two or three weeks, only to quit just because I had to take an unscheduled day off. With a fixed split like this, you’ll find yourself playing catch-up more often than not.

So, what works?

You have two options. Either go full-body, or split your workout into upper/lower days. The typical full-body workout is to lift three days a week, doing one compound exercise for each major muscle group. A common upper/lower split usually means lifting four days a week, alternating between upper body day and lower body day. On an upper/lower split, you’ll do one or two more exercises for each major muscle group. For people just getting started, the full body workout is a great way to start getting your body used to lifting. As your body adjusts, switch to the upper/lower split. A personal trainer recently told me to switch the routine up once a month, so you don’t plateau, so I’d recommend doing full body for four weeks, then switching to upper/lower for four weeks and repeating. But that’s just me. There’s no need to switch things around if you’re getting results with what you’re doing.

Cardio

As for cardio, it’s obviously important, but it varies so much per person, based on his or her goals. Right now, I’m lifting three days a week and try to take two light cardio days each week. If you’re trying to cut body fat, do more cardio. If you’re trying to build muscle mass, do less. There’s not much more to say than that. I think the key to cardio is simply finding something that doesn’t bore you to death. I can handle running outside with my iPod, but find running on a treadmill one of the most horrific experience I know of. My wife, however, runs on the treadmill every day and enjoys it. Try every type of cardio workout you can, and eventually you’ll come up with a list of which ones you can tolerate and which ones you can’t. Also, if you prefer to do cardio on lifting days, always do the cardio at the end of your workout so that you’re not tired when you are lifting.

Sample Full Body Plan (3 sets of 8-10 lifts each)
1. Chest
2. Back
3. Shoulder
4. Legs
5. Calves
6. Biceps
7. Triceps
8. Lower Back
9. Abs

Sample Upper/Lower Plan (3 sets of 8-10 lifts each)

Day 1: Upper Body
1. Chest
2. Chest
3. Back
4. Back
5. Shoulder
6. Shoulders
7. Biceps
8. Triceps

Day 2: Lower Body
1. Leg press or squats
2. Deadlifts or Romanian Deadlifts
3. Step ups or Lunges
4. Leg Curls
5. Calves
6. Lower Back
7. Abs

Things to avoid

Real quick, here’s a list of things to never do again in the gym:

1. Upright rows. They are bad for your shoulders.
2. Leg Extensions. They are bad for your knees. Think about where the weight is distributed on the machine. It’s all on your ankles.
3. Sit-ups . I hate the fact that every time I drive by the ROTC, they’re out there doing these. They’re bad for your back and don’t even work your abs. Do crunches instead.
4. Behind the neck anything. It puts unnecessary strain on your shoulders and you get the same results doing it in front of your face instead.
5. “Rolling” Shoulder Shrugs. I don’t even know what people are trying to accomplish when they do these, but regular shrugs hit your traps just fine and don’t put any strain on your rotator cuffs.
6. Concentrated Curls. Your range of motion is tiny on these and you're putting more stress on your shoulder than you should for a biceps lift.

In closing

Like I said, I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know, but sometimes it helps hearing things from a third party source, right? If you’re happy with your workouts, feel free to ignore this advice, but if you’re just getting started lifting weights for the first time, I hope this helps you start out the right way. Again, this is what works for me. You’ll have to find what works for you; just don’t hurt yourself learning it. And don’t ever let me catch you swinging your back and shoulders trying to lift too much when you’re doing your barbell curls.

Blog update

I decided to bring Theme of Absence back as a traditional blog. Again. Check back around Halloween.