Once upon a time in a faraway land, cats lived in harmony with rainbow unicorns and everyone was happy and ate cotton candy all the time and then a hideous monster named You came and destroyed everything with your epic ugliness.
Hah, nah I’m just kidding. It started on a random day like any other. Thursday I think. Anyway it was just me and my sister and she was being a brat and taking forever in the bathroom taking selfies or something again. All I knew was that I was in my bedroom….you know…..and then all of a sudden she just starts screaming her fucking heading off about something, how there’s blood in the toilet. I’m like ‘yeah duh, aren’t you like, a girl?’ And she just keeps screaming anyway, saying:
“No you don’t understand Charlie, it’s green…..fucking green! WHY IS IT GREEN?”
She keeps fucking screaming and I finally got my ass in there and looked and there was blood in the toilet, leaking up out of the bottom like smoke almost, you know like from a bong? And it was really dark red, pretty much black, but there was actually a weird tinge of green. It was like how you don’t see the shine on a car until up close, you know?
So we told Mom and she was really freaked out and ended up calling a plumber because we didn’t know what else to do, and he couldn’t figure it out, saying shit like it was the weirdest thing he’d ever seen, especially since it wasn’t clogged or anything, and it was just really really creepy and weird and he really had no idea and that we’d honestly probably have to get into the septic tank. Mom was pissed because of course we didn’t have that kind of money but it was so fucking disgusting you could barely go in there, and we couldn’t live like that. So the guy has to go home and get tools and instruments and come back the next day. So we had to fucking wait.
Then the next day, to top it off, he wants me and Kaylee to help him fucking dig to cut costs and Mom totally goes for it because she just wants this all to be over with so we dig for like three days and I’m still so fucking sore from it but anyway we finally found the little handle for the opening and as soon as the guy opens it there’s just the most disgusting, foul, rotting stench that rolls out over everything, our house even stinks like it now, we can’t even sleep there.
And the guy opens it, and I can’t even begin to tell you what I saw. I’m shaking just thinking about it. At the time I think my knees gave out and I almost fucking fell into it, which was almost more terrifying than the thing itself–just the thought of it, fuck, I’m shivering again.
Anyway, I’ll get to the point finally: it was a sick-looking, pink-skinned….thing that couldn’t have been human because it was so bony and misshapen. It was dead, obviously. I can’t really describe it, I’ve never seen it before and neither had anyone else.
But unfortunately, that wasn’t the last of it. Afterward, my sister fucking disappeared a couple of weeks later. Then, a couple of months later, my mom disappeared too. By that time, I’d figured out what was going on. I got out of there real quick. That’s why I’m here, on the street, telling a random stranger with a camera what my story is.
Glad you asked?
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Caitlin Griffin is an English teacher who with the strange job of teaching upperclassmen at a small rural school while living in a largish urban metro. She lives in an apartment with her girlfriend, two cats, and two chinchillas.
Image by Les Chatfield
David Henson
Fun story and good use of narrative voice!
Roy Dorman
Good one, Caitlin. Yeah, I’m glad I asked.